Thursday, June 16, 2016

Three Things Thursday... Single Parenting

Most of you know that I had the opportunity to experience the life of a single parent for 14 weeks at the beginning of this year.
It was a very interesting experience.
I truly don't feel like there are many,
if any,
people who ever plan on parenting alone.
So it's not something that you spend a lot of time thinking about and planning for.

Here are three things that no one told me about single parenting.

1. You can always ask for help.

I am the WORST at asking for help.
I don't like feeling weak or incapable,
but single parenting really helped to teach me that just because you ask for help doesn't mean you are weak or incapable of anything.

Asking for help is simply acknowledging that the talents and time of others can bless you in your life at that particular moment.
It gives others an opportunity to serve and to help.
Why deny others of an opportunity that perhaps they have been hoping for or praying for?
Who I am to deny someone blessings?

I still maintain that I will only ask for help when I have done everything that I could possible have done before I ask for help,
but I have a better understanding of how to ask for help now,
and I have the knowledge that it is okay to ask for help too.

Asking for help does not make you a failure.
In fact it's the complete opposite.
It shows that you want/desire/need the best.

2. It is very rewarding/empowering.

regardless of if you do it alone or with a partner,
is rewarding.

But single parenting is VERY rewarding.
I would go to bed every night completely exhausted,
but also completely amazed that I did it by myself.
I survived another day.
I kept two kids alive and I'm alive and everyone is bathed,
and in bed.

I felt like there wasn't anything I couldn't do because I had successfully parented 2 children by myself.

When my children hit milestones during my short stint as a single parent,
it was such a great feeling!
Although there were many times when I felt like a complete failure,
I still feel that way at times even when I'm not single parenting,
the good really did outweigh the bad.

It's always nice to be able to do something that you thought was impossible.

3. You become less judgmental.

I don't really think of myself as a judgmental person.
I have been through enough in my life to know that really good people are capable of making really bad mistakes.
It's definitely something I learned,
but something I understand better.

Experiencing the life as a single mom,
really made me appreciate those who live that life everyday.
Experiencing the life as a single mom,
really helped me to develop empathy for others.

Instead of rolling my eyes at the screaming child in the grocery cart at the store,
my heart goes out to that poor parent who is trying to simply buy food for her family as well as take care of her children.
I understand how exhausting and how challenging single parenting can be,
and having experienced it first hand really helps me to look up to and admire those doing it alone.

Experiencing the life as a single parent really changed me.
It's helped to me love others more,
have faith in myself and my capabilities as a parent,
and to be so grateful for my husband when he came home.

If you are temporarily experiencing life as a single parent,
please show your partner how much you appreciate them when they return.
Tell them how much you appreciate them.
And allow yourself to grow from the experience you will have as a single parent.

If you are permanently experiencing life as a single parent,
keep going on.
Keep doing your best,
and don't let anything that anyone may say get you down.
As long as you are doing your absolute best,
that's all anyone can ask.
Your children will recognize that,
and you will be blessed.
You are doing better than you think.

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