Spencer and I have always wanted to have a big family. That longing for a big family has increased as we watch Aniston grow and see her love for babies and other children. She would be such an AMAZING big sister!!! People have been asking us since Ani was born when we were going to have another one. The pressure has increased during the past week since she has turned 18 months old. Apparently that is the magic age that you should either have another one of at least be pregnant. I was unaware of this.
Well here's the deal folks... It is up to Spencer and I as to when we choose to grow our family. You can give us your opinion, but you cannot and will certainly not force us to get pregnant. That would be interesting. Currently, I am the main provider for our family while Spencer attends school. During my last pregnancy the hyperemesis was so bad that I was placed on bed rest and had a PICC line and IV's.
I had to quit my job and we relied on Spencer to bring home the bacon. I cannot quit my job and abandon my family like that currently. Sure if we wanted to exclusively live off the government we could do that, but I believe that if you are capable of working and if you're not lazy, you should. I have a great job right now! There's no guarantee that I won't become sick again, in fact the doctor gave me a 50% chance of the hyperemesis returning in the next pregnancy. That's a little overwhelming. It was straight up miserable for me. This time around I need to work, I am a graduate student, and I have a daughter on top of being a wife. It needs to be right for my family.
There are a few other things that really bug me as to the nosiness of people. Don't get me wrong, I love to blog stalk and facebook stalk and know everything about everyone even though it doesn't even matter, that's just the way that I am, but do you really expect me to:
A) fill you in on the timeline and details of mine and my husband's intimate life?
B) tell you when I'm ovulating (really?)
C) take your advice on how to get pregnant fast
D) tell you I'm pregnant the minute I pee on a stick.
First of all, the intimate life of me and Spencer is only our business. Sorry, I just don't share details like that. I have friends who have no shame and they have instilled some horrifying images in my mind. I don't need to know about your intimate life! When I ovulate is absolutely none of your business and frankly half the time I don't even know. I am just not one of those types of girls. I appreciate the information on how you got pregnant, but everyone is different and I will get pregnant when I get pregnant and how I get pregnant. And miscarrying is one of my biggest fears, so besides my parents and Spencer's parents I will not be announcing that I am expecting until I am at least 12 weeks. I just want to be smart about it.
I don't know if it doesn't occur to people that maybe we have been trying and maybe we have been unsuccessful. Maybe getting pregnant the second time around isn't going to be as easy as it was with Aniston. Have people thought of how guilty and bad it makes me feel when they ask why I don't have another one or why I'm not pregnant? It's cool that you wanted your kids 18 months apart, that's what works for you. Everyone is different. Spencer and I are going to do what works for our family. I promise I will let you know when that day comes, and it's a day I am looking forward to. I mean look at how cute Ani is!!! I cannot WAIT to have another adorable Ahlstrom! But it's also a day that I can wait for until WE are ready.
As for now.... We are definitely NOT pregnant!!!